Step 1 – Add ingredients

• Add frozen or fresh chicken breast
• 1 medium onion
• 1 cup of your favorite salsa (or can of rotel – drained)
• 3 tablespoons of chili powder
• 2 tsp paprika
• 1 tablespoon garlic
• salt & pepper.

Step 2 – Cook

This is the easy part. Let your Instant Pot or slow cooker do all the work. Cook at the desired temp and time of your cooker. I used 5 frozen chicken breast and cooked in my Instant Pot for 30 minutes.

*Note – while the chicken is cooking, put your rice on to cook. I use a rice cooker and it’s the best thing ever! In the rice cooker it’s 2 parts liquid to 1 part rice. I like to cook my rice in chicken broth. It gives it such a rich taste.

Step 3 – Shred chicken

This is my least favorite part (and this is still pretty easy.) Take two forks and shred the chicken right in the slow cooker or Instant Pot for your burrito bowls. Let it sit while you put together the toppings. The chicken will soak up the juices that it made in the pain.

Step 4 – Toppings!

This is the fun part! Grab the cheese, sour cream, guacamole, jalapenos, and anything else you love on taco and top your burrito bowl. I just grabbed what was in the fridge and put it in my favorite ramekins. Then put it all together on a platter and voila’ – dinner is served!

Step 5 – Plate it up (or should I say bowl)

Add your rice on the bottom. Use beans or both is that’s what your family likes. Then add some shredded chicken and go to town on the toppings. My husband grows his own peppers so we always have fresh pickled peppers in our house. And we are never short of Valentina Salsa Picante.

Mexican Street Corn

This is one of my favorite side dishes when having taco night or burritos bowls. Grill your corn. I boil mine sometimes if I don’t want to turn the grill on, but grilling is much better for sure. While that is cooking, mix together 1/2 cup mayo and chili powder.

If you’re a mayo-hater, don’t worry it’s nothing like you think. Once your corn is done lather the mayo mixture on. Then roll in grated cotija cheese. Sprinkle on a little more chili powder and top with some lime juice. Amazing!!!

I promise this will be a meal your family will be asking for at least once a week! And you won’t mind saying yes because it’s so super easy and always delicious.

Be sure to check out “Five Ways to Make Mealtime Easier for the Working Mom”.

Bye I love you

Four simple little words that we don’t say nearly enough. So simple, yet so profound. It made me think of my own friends and how we try to always say “Bye. I love you” whenever we leave each other. Friends are the sisters that God made for us when we really need them. He picked them especially for each of us and placed them in our life at just the right moment for just the right reason. That is why we should never leave without turning back to say, “Bye I love you.”

A wave good-bye as I ran off to play.

I remember being a little girl and spending so many nights with my friend, Amy. We were thick as thieves, as they say. I lived for weekends at her house. So calm yet so fun. I didn’t have a care in the world when I was there. My own little oasis. She was an only child, and we were like sisters. We loved watching movies and playing at her grandparent’s house. My mom would drop me off, and as she backed out of that long driveway, I would wave and yell, “Bye I love you.” I knew I would have the best time and that she would be back to get me soon, but in the meantime, Amy and I would have the most amazing adventures in our own little world of make-believe.

The dreaded call came for us to go.

My grandmother had been fighting cancer for some time. We had gotten the call to come to the hospital quickly. At the time, I was only 13 years old. Most of the time I thought I was grown and knew it all, but that particular day I was just a little girl. Scared, naïve, and so unaware of the matters that awaited me. When we arrived the door to her room was open and I remember, it was so dark. She was lying there in bed, but it didn’t look like her at all and I was scared. I was so frighten to go inside.

I know my Dad wanted me too, but I just couldn’t; I just stood at the door. I didn’t want her to know how scared I was. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt her. She was such an incredible person. She created the most fantastic childhood memories for my cousins and me. I knew she was slipping away. I was old enough to realize that my life and many others would be changed forever because she would no longer be in it. As tears streamed down my face, I whispered, “Bye I love you,” and walked away.

Sometimes life doesn’t work out as you planned.

I had a vision of what my life would look like, but God has another. I woke up one morning and looked around, thinking, how did I get here? How did things crumble so fast? Then I realized they had been falling apart all along. Piece by piece, little by little, and I never even noticed. Maybe because I didn’t see it, or perhaps because I didn’t want to. But we had both been breaking off pieces of ourselves and each other for years. One day we were in love and happy, planning to start a family, and the next, standing face to face in front of our brand new home ending a twelve-year relationship. With tears in our eyes, both shaking from emotions we had never felt before, all we could say to one another was, “Bye I love you.”

But then unexpectedly, within time, another came along. He was everything I didn’t know I needed and everything I didn’t think I wanted. He was there, silently working and mending, and before long I realized, he had picked up the pieces. He had been putting them back together. I felt myself letting go and giving in. It was him all along that was putting in the work; he was mending my broken heart. Because he too would say, “Bye I love you.” only he would say it every. single. day.

And then.

Years later, as we walked our little girl to school on her very first day, hand in hand, so tiny and dear, she turned to wave and in a quite little voice said, “Bye I love you.”

Be sure to check out more of our stories on motherhood.

As a little girl that grew up in the early 80’s I remember watching Wonder Woman and wanting to be just like her. When Wonder Woman the movie came out in 2017, it was like I was 8 years old all over again. I was overcome with nostalgia of my childhood. The red and blue suit, the gold arm bands, and the feeling of the ultimate girl power.

I was determined I was going to see the new Wonder Women 1984 movie for myself and decide what my thought was on the movie. But I had to see it on the big screen. Luckily we have an amazing theater in Ridgeland, MS, B&B Theaters, that has been renovated to a state of art facility.

If you watched Wonder Woman 1984 on HBO Max, you watched it wrong.

Let me just say that if you watched Wonder Woman 1984 on HBO Max, you watched it wrong. Trust me! We got the opportunity to watch it on a ScreenX and it was like being in the movie. My daughter was mesmerized and I have to admit so was I. You can’t help but be caught up in the surround sound and picture; just the whole experience was unbelievable.

We had the best day at the movies enjoying some popcorn and our favorite Super hero. I encourage you to check your local theater’s safety protocols for Covid-19. B&B has done a wonderful job with sanitizing and making sure social distancing is in place throughout the building. Some theaters even allow you to rent out an entire screening room so your family can enjoy a movie privately.

“Because no matter how small an act of kindness or generosity or simple positivity you put out into the world, it will make a difference.” ~ Wonder Woman

For tips on how to travel during a pandemic check out: Traveling During a Pandemic.

After seeing your daughter, Sarah Fuller, make history this weekend, I started doing a little research on her background. As one mother to another, I can only imagine how incredibly proud you must be.

I’m sure this weekend was a proud moment, but I’m not sure people know the success that Sarah has already achieved in her fairly short life.

Leading Vandy’s Women’s Soccer Team to an SEC Tournament Title.

Graduating with her undergrad and now working on her master’s.

The philanthropic work that she does and how she works to encourage young girls to follow their dreams.

And of course, I’m sure you were beaming with pride this weekend as she stepped onto the field to be the first woman to ever play in a Power 5 football game. Your little girl made history.

With boldness and strength comes naysays — people who feel compelled to tear down another. Today, I saw some terrible comments about your daughter, and I’ll leave out the details because I’m sure you have seen them already.

As a mother, I can’t imagine how horribly painful and scary those words must be to read about your own child. Yes, a strong, determined woman, but always your child. I want to tell you how terribly sorry I am that such threating words were said. I pray that you and Sarah both saw for every horrifying comment, there were 100 positive and encouraging ones.

Stepping outside the norm is intimidating to people.

It challenges their small minds and short-sightedness. It puts fear in them that they will be exposed for who they really are, mediocre. The words those men spoke were not only cruel and hateful but absolutely appalling, and I pray none of them have daughters of their own.

To say that behavior is absolutely disgusting is an understatement. When I read the comments, good and bad, I immediately thought of you. As a mother of two little girls myself, I just can’t imagine what a range of emotions you must have right now.

The Sarah Fuller plastered all over Sports Center, ESPN, USA Today, and every other major publication in this country, didn’t get where she is today alone. I thought about the hundreds of times you must have driven her to practices, packed snacks and water bottles, washed uniforms and bought new cleats. The amount of money spent on tournaments and hotel rooms. The thousands of miles driven for soccer and the many, many scraped knees you must have doctored.

For that, I want to say thank you. Thank you for raising a remarkable daughter that is an example to others. Thank you for opening the door for other little girls to break boundaries and redefine the norms. We’ve seen a lot of that this year.

Women making history and now we can add Sarah Fuller to the list.

And it’s these women, along with your daughter, that are leading the way for little girls like mine. I’m not sure my daughters quite understand what it means for Sarah Fuller to play football, a woman to have her own STEM show on Netflix, a woman to be appointed to the Supreme Court, or honestly, if they even understand what it means that we will now say Madame Vice President for the first time in history.

But one day, they will, and I pray they will do their part in redefining history on their own terms and in their own way. As I raise my own children, I will think about the mothers of all these women who have paved the way for others. All the sacrifices they made to raise the leaders of today.

You should be so proud, so very proud of Sarah and yourself. Don’t give the haters another thought; cling to all the mothers out there that are thinking and praying for you as your daughter is in the national spotlight right now. One day you’ll both look back on this time, and you’ll tell her children about “that time Mommy played football and along the way, inspired so many little girls to follow their own amazing dreams.”

For more stories about Motherhood, click here.

To read more about why women need to support each other instead of breaking down, check out Women Buildup Women.

Follow along and see how Victoria Prevost of Vintage Vic designed each unique tablescape by using the same base of plates and silverware. We hope you can take these ideas and find items in your own home to recreate these Spring designs.

A Little Bit of Whimsy

Spring brings flowers, bunnies, eggs, and chicks with it, but who says it has to be pinks and pastels? We love this take on Easter by using red, blue, and green as a base. Take a walk through a strawberry patch and see if you feel warm weather in the air!

The linens used for the whimsy tablescape is this green and white check table runner layered with an antique white linen trimmed in red, embroidered with red, blue and yellow eggs.

These adorable strawberry patch dishes were added to enhance the red and just brings a summer time feel. We love the ways the red berries tie in with the red accents and the yellow butterfly brings out the yellow eggs in the linen.

Start by adding some base items to the table. Books are always the perfect height-building item to use in design. We couldn’t love this metal, antique cake plate anymore as the center of the table design. Layer items to help you build height to your table, like these wine glasses and mirrored tray. Together they make the perfect display for your treasured item.

Now finish your table off with the perfect accessories and treasured pieces that you own or find at your local antique/thrift store. Here are some precious pieces, Vintage Vic, used to finish off this whimsy Spring tablescape.

This is a look that would bring a smile to the kiddos and grandparents face at Sunday dinner. We just love this fun, rustic, child-like design! What items do you have at home that could recreate this look?

Rustic Farmhouse Style

Using the base of the same white plates, flatware, and glasses; the linens are changed out for a lace, crochet table cover along with purple accent plants. The plates are the inspiration for the entire look of “rustic purple in Spring”.

Oh how we adore these purple flower and bird plates! Again, add the height-building items to add depth to your table such as books, plates, and nothing screams rustic farmhouse more than a dough bowl!

Vintage Vic filled this dough bowl with green moss, bright purple flowers and robins eggs.

Finish the look off with some of your favorite rustic finds. Here are a few treasures we found while shopping at Antique Aly!

Adding different colors and textures to your tablescape adds an unique and layered look that adds interest to any table. What do you think about the finished look?

Stately Antique Design

So spolier alert! As much as we loved the whimsy and rustic farmhouse looks, the simple details Vintage Vic added to this statly tablescape was a total winner.

Using the same base of white plates, she did change out the glassware and added the coffee cup and saucer. No formal Southern table is complete without a cup and saucer for coffee with your Hummingbird Cake for dessert.

Again the linens and accent plates were exchanged for this beautiful white linen tablecloth and these very simplistic almost retro plates. We just love the different styles and textures this table adds to our different design ideas.

Sticking to the simplicity of this look there is no height-building elements. There are several different layers of textures. This unusual centerpiece is a Wedgewood Rams Head soup tureen with antique door knobs used to resemble eggs in a basket.

But what seals the deal on this “stately” dinner tablescape are the concert bust of the dog and rabbit! And they’re in their best dinner attire. How perfect are these guys?

These two handsome guys are ready for a delicious Sunday roasted chicken dinner and we are too!! The completed look of this formal tablescape just really came together and we are so in love with everything about this! How do you think it turned out?

We hope our three different tablescape ideas have given you some inspiration to dig through your closets and cupboards and pull out all those old treasures you’ve kept tucked away. Start with your base of linens and dishes and build up from there!

A very special thank you to Vintage Vic and Antique Aly for putting together these amazing tablescapes. You can follow them both on facebook and on Instagram @msvintagevic and @antiqualyms.

I live in Mississippi where there have been no confirmed cases as of yet, but it’s only a matter of time I’m sure. In his comforting and reassuring why that only my husband has, he commented that I had a better chance of being killed by the flu. And sure enough, he was right. But don’t tell him I said that please!

In the United States, the CDC estimates that an average 56,000 people die a year of the flu. That is 154 deaths a day from the flu.

Every 37 seconds one person dies of cardiovascular disease.

Since I’ve been working on a heart disease series this past month, I’ve been doing an enormous amount of research on the subject. Cardiovascular disease is the leading cause of death for men, women, and people of most racial and ethnic groups in the United States. One person dies every 37 seconds in the United States from cardiovascular disease. Every 37 seconds. That is roughly 647,000 Americans die from heart disease each year. Please understand that for every four deaths in American each year, one dies of cardiovascular disease. 

That just absolutely blows my mind the number of people that are losing their lives to heart disease. Yet how many of you have heard those stats? February is Heart Month, so you many have recently been exposed to more information about the American Heart Association and cardiovascular disease, but it’s not being discussed on every news channel and flyers are not up in every public building addressing it as a pandemic like the Coronavirus is.

Did you know that the CDC defines a pandemic as “an epidemic that has spread over several countries or continents, usually affecting a large number of people.”

We buy target out of hand sanitizer but we continue to abuse our bodies with obesity, smoking, stress, lack of exercise. Do you know that heart disease can be prevented in a lot of cases, even reversed? Is anyone screaming about that? Are we eager to learn more about heart disease and how we can avoid dropping dead of a heart attack? Are our politicians, doctors and the media speaking out about the epidemic, or for heaven’s sake, the pandemic of what heart disease is doing to this country?

No, they are not.

Type 1 diabetes and children.

In 2018, 34.2 million Americans, or 10% of the population, had diabetes. Nearly 1.6 million Americans have type 1 diabetes, including about 187,000 children and adolescents. Over 1.5 million Americans are diagnosed with diabetes every year. Every single year. And 210,000 Americans under age 20 are estimated to have diagnosed diabetes, approximately 0.25% of that population.

We spray our kids down with Lysol and make them wear rubber gloves as we continue to load our children up with sugar and sit them in front of the TV. We fear that they will become infected with the Coronavirus, but don’t think twice about the dangers of childhood diabetes.

What sense does that make?

Cancer is killing us and our children.

In 2019, an estimated 606,880 people died of cancer in the United States. Each year in the U.S., an estimated 15,780 children aged 0-19 are diagnosed with cancer.

‎Children are dying of cancer everyday and what do we hear about it? We see “Fight for Ryan” and “Believing for Brandy” on Facebook. We follow people’s cancer journey on Facebook. We feel their emotions and yearn to fight with them, because it’s such a hopeless felling. We pray and cry even for complete strangers because we know all to well what this terrible disease will do. And what is being down about saving lives from cancer? Research we know from wonderful organizations like American Cancer Society, Susan G. Komen, and St. Jude’s, but why aren’t we doing more?

Suicide is a leading cause of death in adolescents.

Suicide is the second leading cause of death for ages 10-24. Ten years old! My God, why??? What is happening to a ten year old to cause them to feel like this is their only options. 

More teenagers and young adults die from suicide than from cancer, heart disease, AIDS, birth defects, stroke, pneumonia, influenza, and chronic lung disease, COMBINED.

Each day in our nation, there are an average of over 3,000 suicide attempts by young people in grades 9-12.  Four out of five teens who attempt suicide have given clear warning signs. Our children are screaming our for help!! Are we listening to them as closely as we are listening to CNN or Fox News about the Coronavirus?

Wake up! Our children are killing themselves. Taking their own life away from us, their family, themselves and are we so terrified of adolescent suicide that we are rushing out getting help for our young people. Fighting for healthcare benefits to help those with mental illness.

Over 47,000 Americans take their life each year. Everyday 128 people will end their life. 

We have to stop and look at the bigger picture here. People are fighting the Cornavirus. They are being a active participant in keeping their family safe. They are reading up about it, watching the news, taking necessary precautions and rightfully so. Educate yourself, but why haven’t we done that for heart disease, cancer, diabetes or suicide? Is it just because it’s been around so long and we’re numb to it now?

Is no one shocked and horrified that almost 650,000 Americans will die from cardiovascular disease, but the entire world is on lock down because 4000 people worldwide have died? I just don’t get it. Let’s put this in perspective. It’s terrible when any life is taken away for any reason. I am not making light of human life or of this new virus. Those 4000 people were mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, sons, daughters and friends; but so were the nearly 7,500 people that died today in the United States. 

Thirty people just died while you were reading this article and it wasn’t from the Coronavirus.

Emily had been craving sushi and decided, against her better judgement, they were getting some take out. But God had different plans. Her water broke and they never made it to pick up dinner.

Ava James Lynch was born at 5:00am on February 29, 2016.

“It didn’t hit me until after we were asked to do an interview for the news. I didn’t even think about the significance on the date at the time. I was just so happy to see my baby,” Emily explained.

So what is the point of Leap Year? Put simply, the additional 24 hours are built into the calendar to ensure that it stays in line with the Earth’s movement around the sun. While today’s calendar contains 365 days, the actual time it takes for Earth to orbit its star is slightly longer, roughly 365.2421 days.

The difference seems mynute, but over decades and centuries that missing quarter of a day per year can add up. Similar to all the lose change you lose in the dryer. To ensure consistency with the true astronomical year, it is necessary to periodically add in an extra day to make up the lost time and get the calendar back in sync with the heavens.

So today, February 29, 2020, at fours years old sweet Ava James will finally celebrate her first birthday. This causes you to scratch your head a little. Emily shared, “Her birthday is different because of the day she was born, but everyone has a birthday. Her birthday is really no more important than anyone else really. I will make a big deal out of her birthday every year just like I will her sisters. I imagine that her birthdays that fall on the 29th will be a little more special. I don’t want to make Rosie feel like hers isn’t as special because she doesn’t have a weird birthday.”

Although Ava James couldn’t comprehend why she was having a “baby smash cake”, Emily really wanted the one-year cake smash pictures and it just so happened, she was 4 on her 1st birthday.

She had no desire to date any time soon. That was until she met Andrew West, a soccer player from Scotland that had just graduated from Belhaven College in 2018.

As they spent more time together, Tiffany started to think that maybe this was going beyond being friends. Two months after meeting, Andrew was scheduled to travel back to Scotland for three months to visit his family as he did every year while being in school.

The newly dating couple decides to continue their relationship long-distance, knowing that Andrew would return to the states after his visit. Tiffany had no idea what the next three months would hold for them.

Only three weeks into Andrew’s visit back to Scotland, his mother dies of cardiac arrest. She happened to be in South Africa on a surprise visit to see her sister. With no warning signs or symptoms, her heart just stops causing her death at only 63 years old.

Both Andrew’s parents, Dennis and Christy West, had recently retired. They were planning to travel, play golf and enjoy retirement, when tragedy struck. “It was just a terrible time,” Tiffany explained “everyone was in shock. It was just awful. We had pretty recently started dating, he’s in Scotland, I’m here, and his mother has just died of a heart attack.” 

Andrew and Tiffany’s relationship continued to grow stronger over the course of the next three months while Andrew was away. During that time Tiffany mentions that their verbal and mental connection became extremely strong due to the fact they were physically apart. 

Tiffany shares the first time she went to Scotland to meet Andrew’s family. “I was so excited to jump on a plane and see this guy [Andrew] that had stolen my heart. I was also so nervous about meeting his family. With the passing of Christy, it showed us that life is short and if you have to jump on a plane to meet the family then you do it. Meeting Dennis [Andrew’s father] for the first time was an amazing feeling. I remember he walked into his kitchen after his round of golf to find Andrew and I there. Him, Andrew’s brothers and even Andrew always made me feel so loved and accepted.  Dennis has one of those smiles that just immediately makes you feel good and makes you want to smile back. He’s the type of man to jump on a plane last minute just to be present in the moment. I’ve never fit in so well with a family and I am so lucky to now be a member of this one! I genuinely am so blessed to have found the West Family.”

Andrew returned home from his summer in Scotland and early the following year he asked Tiffany to marry him. They were so excited about starting their life together that they began planning the wedding immediately. Coming from two different parts of the world, they were finding it difficult to figure out how to get their family and friends together to be part of this very special occasion. During this time, Dennis began complaining that he was having shortness of breath.

After retiring at 68 from the banking industry, Dennis became Head Master for all the golf courses in St. Andrews. He assisted with tournaments and organized events which kept him extremely busy. Always on the go, he began to find himself getting more and more tired. He was having shortness of breath and just not feeling well. After seeing his general practitioner, he was referred to a cardiologist for further testing. 

At that time it was discovered that one of Dennis’ arteries was calcified causing one of his major aortic valves to collapse. Coronary artery calcification (CAC) is the buildup of calcium in the arteries, which can cause blood vessels to narrow and lead to the development of heart disease. 

Coronary artery disease is thought to begin with damage or injury to the inner layer of a coronary artery, sometimes as early as childhood. The damage may be caused by various factors, including: smoking, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes or insulin resistance or a sedentary lifestyle.

Once the inner wall of an artery is damaged, fatty deposits or plaque made of cholesterol tend to accumulate at the site of injury in a process called atherosclerosis. If the surface of the plaque breaks or ruptures, blood cells called platelets will clump at the site to try to repair the artery. This clump can block the artery, leading to a heart attack.

In order to correct the problem, Dennis had a synthetic valve put in to allow the blood to flow properly. It was a procedure that ultimately saved his life. 

Dennis was recovering and slowly getting better.  Tiffany and Andrew knew that life was just too short and they were ready to begin their life together. “Nothing ever seemed to work out for planning the wedding. Dennis was ok and was healing and we finally felt like we could breath. So we just said one day ‘lets do it’!”

Within just a few weeks they planned their wedding and decided to get married in the states, then travel to Scotland to have a small service and reception with Andrew’s family. With Dennis’ post op being only a month out, they knew he wouldn’t be able to attend the wedding. 

The day before the wedding, Tiffany and Andrew had gone to make sure everything was ready at the venue. As Tiffany walks towards Andrew she sees him talking to a man and Andrew seems to be in shock. Immediately she thought something had gone wrong with the location, but as she walks closer she realized the man was Dennis. He had flown half way across the world to be with his son on his wedding day. Nothing was going to keep him away. Not even open heart surgery. 

“Having him [Dennis] on this earth was the greatest gift but having him present for our big day was priceless. Dennis is now healthy and happy living his active life thanks to the amazing doctors that caught and fixed his beautifully big heart,” Tiffany shared.

Dennis was one of the lucky ones. Cardiovascular disease kills more Americans each year than any other disease and nearly half of all U.S. adults have some type of cardiovascular disease. 

February is American Heart Month, a time the nation turns its attention to keeping families and communities free from heart disease.

The first proclamation was issued by President Lyndon B. Johnson in February 1964, nine years after he had a heart attack. Since then, the president has annually declared February American Heart Month. The federally designated event reinforces the importance of heart health and the need for more research.

Get a regular check-up. Recognize the symptoms. Don’t disregard those feelings that something isn’t right. Stop smoking. Eat better. Get more sleep. Fight for your health. See your children get married.

Special thank you to Metro Jackson Heart Association, Kerri Chaney of Style + Brand Photography, Amy Steed Heard of Once Upon a Dress Madison, The Chapel at Livingston, and Courtney Merck or Amour Z Salon and Spa and Allie Grace Bell.

No one has ever lived a more successful life than Peggy Martin Holder.

From the time she was a young girl she was caring for other people. Peggy was raised in a military family and sadly, lost her father to cancer at only 13 years old. She was left to help take care of her three younger brothers, one of which had cystic fibrosis who passed away only 3 years after her father.

She later married and had two children, Chad and Julie. The absolute loves of her life. She worked outside the home, raised a family, looked after her brothers as a big sister always does, cared for a husband, and later took care of her aging mother.

Peggy had to start at a young age being a caregiver and worrying about other people. She always gave to others before ever doing anything for herself. She would have never considered it a burden or sacrifice, because that was her nature. She was the most gentle, caring, and giving person I have ever known. 

I can add myself to that list of people she helped take care of because she was like a second mother to me. I met Julie, Peggy’s daughter, when I was only 14 years old and we became fast friends. I spent just about every weekend at their house growing up. Some of my fondest memories of her mom were in the kitchen baking. Peggy made the absolute best cheesecake I’ve ever eaten. And if you’ve ever had some of Peggy’s baked treats you know exactly what I’m talking about. 

She loved to bake. She was always baking mainly for other people. She rarely ate sweets herself, but it is hard to recount a time that she didn’t have something she had baked ready for us to taste test. It wasn’t just about the baked treats; she had a way of just making things so pretty, the tray they were on or the package she wrapped them in. She was all about the details.

Oh could Peg wrap, sew, design, create, and craft! She loved to craft. Her crafting room was her oasis. Her place to go and unwind. Her place to work and create. Her place to relieve the stresses of life. She could clear her head and work on creating beautiful things that she loved for all the people that she loved.

The Stresses of Life

Like a lot of moms, she was always so busy helping and doing for others that she rarely took time for herself. As women, we worry about our children. We worry about our parents. We worry about finances. We worry about laundry and dirty dishes. We tend to worry so much about things that are out of control which ultimately induce stress and unhealthy habits.  

Everyone experiences stress and we all react to it in different ways. How much stress you experience and how you react to it can lead to a wide variety of health problems.

Stress can also contribute to factors that increase your risk of heart disease, like high blood pressure and high cholesterol. When you are stressed, your body releases adrenaline, a hormone that temporarily causes your heart rate to speed up and your blood pressure to rise. High blood pressure can cause damage to artery walls, creating blood clots and increasing your risk of heart attack.

Mitral Valve Prolapse

Peggy did have Mitral Valve Prolapse. She had it her whole life. If you are not familiar with what MVP is, it’s a condition in which the two valve flaps of the mitral valve do not close smoothly or evenly, but instead bulge upward into the left atrium. In some cases, the prolapsed valve lets a small amount of blood leak backward through the valve, which may cause a heart murmur.  In most cases, MVP is completely harmless. Most people who have the condition are unaware of it and their health is not affected. Having MVP typically will not impact your health and requires no treatment.

She had not had any symptoms leading up to September 25, 2010. Peggy and her husband of 37 years, Billy, were visiting Julie and her family for the weekend. In the wee hours of the morning she got up because she couldn’t sleep and she went into the bathroom.  Moments later the entire house was awoken by the slamming of the door. Peggy had collapsed from cardiac arrest and had fallen against the door causing it to slam shut. 

Julie pushed her way into the bathroom and began working diligently to perform CPR on her mother, fighting with every breath to keep her alive. Not understanding that she was already gone, she continued to breathe in and out begging with each breath to wake up from this nightmare. 

A Widowmaker Heart Attack

What they didn’t know at the time was that Peggy had died from a widowmaker heart attack at only 55 years old. The doctor later told the family that it wouldn’t have mattered if she was standing right there in the hospital. There would have been nothing anyone could have done. 

A widowmaker heart attack is a type of heart attack that’s caused by a 100% blockage of the left anterior descending artery. Someone is literally standing one second and gone the next, quite often with no symptoms. The LAD artery carries fresh blood into the heart so that the heart gets the oxygen it needs to pump properly. If it’s blocked, the heart can stop very quickly 

But the widowmaker isn’t always fatal. The symptoms of one are essentially the same as those of any type of heart attack. Some of the warning signs you should be aware of are: chest pain; pain radiating in arms, legs, back, and jaw; abdominal pain; difficulty breathing, feeling anxious, dizzy or disoriented; feeling sick and getting sweaty.

Women are more likely to experience many of these symptoms without having chest pain.

The Importance of Regular Check-ups

“If people can take away one thing from her story, I hope it’s that they understand the importance of getting regular check-ups. My mother rarely went to the doctor and she just didn’t take care of herself. Get your annual check-up. I know that is what she would want other women to know,” explained Julie. 

Peggy left an incredible mark on this world. It wasn’t with a great big stamp marked, “Here I am!” because that wasn’t her style. She never needed or wanted the spotlight. She was just as happy standing behind you cheering you on. She left her dainty, elegant, beautiful mark of this earth through lace and ribbons, fabric scraps and flowers, cookies and cheesecakes. She left everyone she ever met a different person through her devoted love, unwavering support and caring heart.

All she ever wanted was for her family to be happy and well taken care of. She performed that duty with great diligence until the day she died. I know she is still wearing the badge of mother, wife, grandmother, sister and friend with great pride. She left behind a legacy to be passed on to her children and one day her grandchildren to live as she did, understanding the importance of caring and giving to others.

Her daughter Julie shares, “I miss her. She was just the best. The most selfless, kind hearted person I’ve ever known. To know her truly was to love her. I will never be the same without her, she was my best friend and my biggest fan. I never imagined my life without her and now 10 years later, it still seems like a terrible nightmare. It absolutely breaks my heart that my daughter will not know what an amazing person she was. Her grand babies are missing out on knowing her and that hurts so much . She had so much love to give.  She spent her whole life taking care of everyone else’s heart but her own.”

You can read more about dealing with the loss of a best friends mother at: https://magnolia-moms.com/burying-your-best-friends-mother/. 

Special thanks once again to our partners on this special project: Metro Jackson American Heart Association, Kerri Chaney of Stye + Brand Photograpy, Amy Steed Heard of Once Upon a Dress Madison, The Chapel at Livingston, Kristin Butkowski and Courtney Merck of Amour Z Salon and Spa, and Allie Grace Bell. 

Kelli Rush Hood, a Magnolia Mom contributor and a Licensed Professional Counselor, is bringing our readers a new series entitled: Self-care Saturday. She is sharing tips and techniques for managing and reducing stress for the busy, stressed out Moms. Be sure to check it out every Saturday morning at https://www.facebook.com/MSMagnoliaMoms. 

“Reggie, they will probably put you in the hospital,” his wife Charlotte told him.

“I’m not going to any damn hospital,” Reggie snarled.

 “You’ll do whatever they tell you to do!” She had spoken and that was the end of it. 

He was to call her once he got home from the doctor, but that call never came. His wife of over forty years found him on the kitchen floor with the microwave door still open and his oatmeal and banana on the counter. Just like he had eaten every morning for years.

Cardiac arrest had killed Reggie Ellis; husband, father, and Papaw at the age of 82.

“I just knew. I just had this feeling. The Sunday before he died I told Philip [my husband] ‘I feel like this is the last time we will see him.’ There was just something about his look. He looked more frail, he looked like he was not well. We thought he had pneumonia. He had been having shortness of breath and what we thought was chest congestion. I just felt so uneasy leaving him that day.” Stacie Ellis Schrader, his oldest daughter, explains as she recounts the events of those last few days with her dad. 

Cardiac arrest is the leading cause of death

Sudden cardiac arrest is a leading cause of death – over 320,000 out-of-hospital cardiac arrests occur annually in the United States.  Sudden cardiac arrest occurs suddenly and often without warning. It is triggered by an electrical malfunction in the heart that causes an irregular heartbeat. With its pumping action disrupted, the heart cannot pump blood to the brain, lungs and other organs. Seconds later, a person loses consciousness and has no pulse. Death occurs within minutes if the victim does not receive treatment.

(Source: www.heart.org. Heart Attack or Sudden Cardiac Arrest: How Are They Different? https://www.heart.org/en/health-topics/heart-attack/about-heart-attacks/heart-attack-or-sudden-cardiac-arrest-how-are-they-different. July 31, 2015.)

Receiving that dreadful call

Melissa Ellis Bell, the Ellis’ youngest daughter, remembers the morning she received that dreadful call. “On February 2nd, 2009, my dad whispered ‘I love you’ and I watched my parents back out of my driveway. Two days later on February 4th, I received that soul crushing phone call. My husband was on an airplane. My kids were at school. And I’ve never felt more lost or alone. He was always my larger than life Daddy. Everyone knew him. Everyone loved him. And just like that he was gone. Only God got me to my parents’ house 50 miles away that day. My baby girl, his oldest grandchild, was in 1st grade and this year she graduates. We [the girls] were always his greatest pride and my heart hurts a little extra this year. I can just see him beaming with pride over all of her great accomplishments. I can’t wait until that day when I can see that beaming smile full of pride, hug his neck, watch him roll his eyes at Cha Cha [my mother] and hear him whisper I love you again. I miss him everyday.”

Know the symptoms

All these symptoms he was experiencing were also common symptoms of a heart attack. Most heart attacks involve discomfort in the chest that lasts more than a few minutes, or that goes away and comes back. It can feel like uncomfortable pressure, squeezing, fullness or pain. Symptoms can also include pain or discomfort in one or both arms, the back, neck, jaw or stomach.  Shortness of breath is another common symptom and is often disguised as being tired, a cold, or being out of shape. Sometimes this is accompanied by chest discomfort but not always. Other signs may include breaking out in a cold sweat, nausea or lightheadedness.

Women have slightly different symptoms than men. They primarily feel chest pain and experience more of the other symptoms particularly shortness of breath, nausea/vomiting, and back or jaw pain. If you ever experience any of these symptoms do not hesitate to call 9-1-1.

(Source: www.heart.org. Warning Signs of a Heart Attack.  https://www.heart.org/en/health-topics/heart-attack/warning-signs-of-a-heart-attack. June 30, 2016)

Fighting to overcome a stroke

Ten years prior, Reggie had been out running on one of those typical hot and muggy Mississippi summer days. Even at 70 years old he still ran and worked out everyday. He believed in staying fit by exercising, eating a high fat Mediterranean diet, and he drank a glass of red wine religiously every single day.

He was scheduled to pick up his bride, Charlotte, after work but when he was late arriving she called to check on him. When he answered the phone he was slurring his words and told her he was having a hard time getting dressed. Once Charlotte and Stacie arrived at the house, they knew he was having a stroke. 

Luckily it was caught in time and he was able to make a full recovery. While in the hospital he wanted a newspaper immediately, he wanted to keep his brain sharp and his body active. He refused to rest because he wanted to be sure his mind and body stayed healthy. He knew what could happen if he didn’t fight to stay strong and active and he refused to let that happen. 

Happy and healthy once again

Reggie, went on to live twelve more amazing years with his wife and two girls. He saw his girls get married and four beautiful, healthy grandbabies come into the world. He continued to run and work out everyday, enjoyed Sunday dinner with the entire family and played with the grandchildren every chance he got. 

“When I think back on my dad, I think about how much he loved life and how much fun he was. We always joked about how he never met a stranger. All of this was very obvious at his visitation when people we didn’t know showed up to tell us a funny Reggie story. I remember in high school I would drive by Pump & Save, where he worked, on a Friday or Saturday night and guys from school would be sitting on the counter listening to his stories. People were drawn to my dad because of his larger than life personality.  He always lived life to the fullest. He loved my mom and loved my sister and I so much. He was so proud of all four of his grandchildren. People around town would tell me how he would always show off pictures of them. He would have been an amazing grandpa to them. It breaks my heart that they will not get to experience life with Papaw Reggie. It would have been one hell of a ride,” shares Stacie. 

Reggie Ellis was an amazing man full of life, love and heart. A great man with a big heart. I was fortunate enough to know him personally since I was a teenager. The one thing I remember most about him was his smile. He was always wearing it, but it grew even bigger when he saw his girls, my dear friends Stacie and Melissa. A father’s love never fades, no matter if they are still here on earth or gone from this world. He continues to walk with them as they live their own lives now. He shows them that he is here with them through all their trials and tribulations, through all their successes and sorrows, through all the memories they are making. He is always there. He lives forever in their hearts. 

February is American Heart Month. It was created as a chance to raise awareness about preventing heart disease. Go red in support of Heart Month. Help us spread the word about heart disease. 

Special thank you to Kerri Chaney of Style + Brand Photography, Amy Steed Heard of Once Upon a Dress, The Livingston Chapel, Kristin Butkowski of Amour Z Salon & Spa, and Allie Grace Bell make-up artist for helping make this project possible.